I remember after such a long journey to receiving healing with endometriosis, getting pregnant with Jacqueline seemed like God’s promises of children were coming to pass. When we lost her, it was hard to understand what God was doing. When we lost Ezra, nine months later, it was even more difficult to understand God’s plan. Eventually, God revealed that our children in heaven, were not part of the promises of living children that were spoken. Losing Jacqueline left a huge hole for God to fill, and so He begin to do a work in me. Losing Ezra brought me to the end of myself again, which of course allowed more room for the Holy Spirit.

I have received so much healing and God has been so good through it all. The truth is, 1 in 4 women experience miscarriage. This isn’t a failure of faith. You may not be able to worship right away or read scripture, my advice is don’t force or fake it. The key is to keep communication open with God, cast your pain to him and let yourself feel it all. Breakthrough will come.

The goodness of God isn’t dependent on our circumstances, the real miracle here is how we’re transformed through them. If this is for you or a loved one, just know God has never left you and is waiting for you to talk with him. We serve a God who still speaks. Remember what God has spoken and war with that truth.

You’re going to come out of this stronger, but in the meantime, give yourself grace.